I see people getting married to people they’ve known for, like, a year and a half. A year and a half? Is that really enough time to get to know someone to know you want to spend the REST of your life with them? I mean, I’ve had sweaters for a year and a half and I was like, “What the fuck was I doing with this sweater?
We can’t jump off bridges anymore because our iPhones will get ruined. We can’t take skinny dips in the ocean, because there’s no service on the beach and adventures aren’t real unless they’re on Instagram. Technology has doomed the spontaneity of adventure and we’re helping destroy it every time we Google, check-in, and hashtag.